HIP CHECK: 2013 RRHOF Rant
I always experience vein-bursting, sphincter-puckering conniption fits when the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announces its annual inductees. That organization drives me nuts. This year, to my great relief (and that of my doctor, wife and daughter), it’s more like a disagreement, a few quibbles… and one giant pisser.
— Hall and Oats: REALLY? In the big debate of “derivative or influential,” I think they were the Lenny Kravitz’s of their generation. That Philly soul thing they had? Somebody ELSE created that years before them… you know that, right Rock Hall? Right? Right??? DISAGREE.
— Linda Ronstadt: Again… really? Make no mistake, I totally love her stuff. She benevolently ruled the 70’s and was the incredibly rare female performer on most rock radio stations. “Simple Dreams” is still a great album. But… rock and roll? My vote is… kind of not. Still, she did Chuck Berry proud with her version of “Livin’ In The USA.” QUIBBLE.
— Cat Stevens: See Linda Ronstadt. Love his stuff (mostly) but it’s NOT rock and roll… at least, not rock and roll enough to get into a Hall of Fame for ROCK AND ROLL. QUIBBLE.
— All Other Inductees (Peter Gabriel, KISS, Nirvana, The E Street Band, Andrew Loog Oldham, Brian Epstein): Pretty much a big “hell yes.” Congrats. Come on in.
As for the nominees that didn’t make it, the biggest pisser is that one of the all-time great alt-rock bands (possibly the ORIGINAL alt-rock band) DID NOT get in…
— The Replacements: WTF?!? Maybe they didn’t sell a lot of records but they had the same vibe as the Velvet Underground — (paraphrasing) everyone that bought a Mats album went out and formed their own band (or bought their first bottle of whiskey, coin-toss). Their attitude, arrogance, daring, unabashed lack of skill, heart-wrenching lyrics, vicious guitars and yes, sheer utter insouciance (look it up) demand that they be included. Feh. Maybe next year. DISAGREE
— All other 2014 nominees: Yes should be in and probably will be soon. The Meters (look them up) absolutely should be but probably won’t. NWA should be too (coming from me, that’s saying something). Link Wray should be in because he invented the power chord, or at least owns the claim that he did (he died so I won’t argue). Hell, he should be in for “Rumble” alone.
So, although I avoided complete vapor-lock this year, I’ve noticed that as time wears on I have a growingly complicated relationship with the Rock Hall. I agree less and less with their increasingly egalitarian choices, and as an institution, the Hall seems to show the opposite of what it intends: instead of demonstrating the vibrant and growing genre of rock & roll, each year’s inductees show me how over the past years the form has, in fact, been shrinking in impact, reach and influence. (I blame the decline of rock radio, but I’m biased.
I believe that inductees like Donna Summer (2013) and ABBA (2010) were primarily influenced by rock, and NOT so much influential to the rockers that followed them. But then, if “influential” was really a factor, Lemmy and Motorhead would have been voted in years ago.
The shit hit the fan for me when Madonna got in (2008) and, a few years later, when Oprah Winfrey was allowed to induct SomeoneanyoneIdon’tevenrememberwho (2013). Much as I love what the Hall tries to be, I consider their shark to have been leaped.
“Good night, Cleveland. Thank you and drive safely.”
Close your eyes. Open your mind.
Trust your ears.
(This post appeared on my Facebook page on December 17, 2013.)
